Complexity meets simplicity..
goodbye to u, long hair. i dont know what went over me. perhaps i was possessed? waha. i'm starting to regret it.. :( i've been keeping it since jc 2? apart from occasional trimmings but not to this length.. anyway i felt like a celebrity throughout the whole thing. lol. 2 person attending to me. from cutting to dye-ing to highlighting to washing n blow-drying. waha. lucky me eh? so it's well worth the 90 bucks i paid. :P the guy kept saying i look so cute in my new haircut. erm.. my sis say it's ugly? aye.. i tink it's alright la..
it's only when u lose something that u'll start to treasure it. such is the nature of man. why cant ppl appreciate what they have got but only when it's gone that they regret having not given wholeheartedly? i guess it's just something inherent in most everyone? to take things for granted. i'm not pin-pointing anyone cos i'm guilty of it too. aye.. perhaps i'm just asking for it. i'm too sentimental for my own good. what's past is past. u cant change it n u cant relive it. to keep holding on will just be a stigma in ur life n u'll find it hard to move on. aha. i know it all too well but.. easier said than done.
Saturday, July 29, 2006
sometimes i think i can be too demanding? maybe i'm abit too pampered. so plz dont get too close to me for ur own comfort. that's my advice. haha. hmmx.. it's true that my frens have nv seem me get angry. but i do get irritated easily.. for example when ppl dont keep their promises. well.. maybe not exactly promises. sounds too lovey-dovey n tv dramas.. ok. i'd say it's when ppl go back on their words. hate it most when ppl arrange to meet but in the end didnt bcos of whatever reason. another thing is when ppl dont reply my sms or takes eternity to reply. maybe bcos i'll usually reply immediately to any sms (unless u really piss me then i wouldnt reply at all. wahaha. i know i'm mean in that sense). one more thing that i can never understand is why ppl can say things like 'i like u' etc online or over sms but not face-to face? in a way, it's more sincere n u can determine if the person really means it from his facial expression n body language? alright! i know i'm being double standard cos i myself havent the guts to do it but well.. if i'm not the one who's saying it i can criticize. waha. but then one thing bad is that i dont really know how to handle that kind of situations too. luckily so far most guys have chosen to take the easier way out. phew.. i can choose not to have heard. n after u end the conversation, close the window, it's gone, without any memory. so isnt it better to say things out face to face? anyway yup! i'm just saying like it's not my business cos it isnt me who's going to feel awkward n have to muster up all my courage. n this is so bcos i'm never ever going to take the initaitive n tell some guy my attraction for him (if i have that is).. it's so malu to be rejected! never again.. 1 last thing that puts me off is vulgarities. so plz dont ever use those words in front of me. though i wouldnt be as extreme as val, but i'll really be disgusted.
ok. basically this post is about what makes me tick. it's not relating to anyone in particular. however if u find urself familiar in any of the situation, no offence k? it's purely coincidental. haha. either that or u've really stepped on my toes. waha.
Friday, July 28, 2006
went to sing at partyworld with ru. cheap! 9.50 for 3 hrs~ too bad i cant sing for nuts. waha~ n so i 'killed chicken' again. oops.. anyway ah ru, thanks for bearing with it! we shall meet up more often. b4 u go for ur studies ya? if not we'll hafta wait till 4 yrs later liao.. :(
met up with darling yest. i love my darling cos she always give me a nice cosy hug when she sees me. *hee* thanks for being so lovable! n i'm real glad she's found someone who really treats her well n treasure her. so sweet. =) isnt it great that after some twists n turns the 2 of them still found their way back together hor? this shows u 2 r meant to be right? cheers!! maybe one day i can go play gooseberry? hoho.
am i the last thing on ur mind when u go to bed at night?
Thursday, July 27, 2006
ok. i admit i blog everytime i'm in the office. i cant help it though. cos i'm just too free!! maybe i'm just super fast in calling ppl? cos for the same list i can complete in 1 wk which is 3 days.. n the next wk i start calling it all over again.. sigh.. those ppl not sian i also sian.. ha. anyway going out for lunchie! oh no.. i'm getting fatter by the day.. eating out almost every day.. sigh..
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
finally i get to eat bk breakfast! waha. i know i sound silly.. it's not like it's some wow~ happening. but i've been wanting to eat that ever since i know bk has breakfast menu? oops.. i think i sound like i come from some backward place.. well.. 1 of my nickname is mountain tortoise. ha. anyway thanks caleb for the company n sweet!
i seem to be in hot demand lately? wahah. suddenly everyone want my company? hoho. meeting the gers tonight for dinner. meeting darling for dinner tmr. dear asked to meet for lunch on fri but i'm kind of tired liao.. so i pushed it to mon n i realized i'm going k lunch with ru. luckily dear can make it in the evening. :P
please dont fall in love with me.. you know my history.. i'm just trying to warn you.. you should run while you can..
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
my boss asked me an interesting question today cos they were talking about road rage n the strings of words they use. what do i scold when i'm antagonized? hmm.. that's a pretty good question. i dont usually use vulgarities.. the harshest words i use are ass, bitch, idiot, wu gui (tortoise)? waha. anyway they started teasing me n said maybe i'll be like saying tao yan n all those.. am i so gu niang? lol. well.. i am. but i only said that to lw last time. haha. n he liked to irritate n make fun of me cos he said he liked the way i say it? bleah..
1 lesson for guys: it is only gentlemanly not to let a girl sit in the middle in the backseat, esp for one wearing skirt. this is what i learnt from my boss. come to think of it, it never crossed my mind. if u cannot figure out the reason, ask me lo. haha. anyway i'm outta the office. 2 tuition scheduled!!
visited my grandma yest. i think it's been a few months since i last visited her.. grandma seem to be looking better though the right side of her body is still unable to move. she can use her left hand to touch my niece though. n i can see that she is very happy to see her. =) but she cant talk to me cos her speech is impaired but i try to lip-read n more or less guess what she's saying. undergoing physio now.. hope grandma will have a speedy recovery.
i've decided on what modules to take. hopefully i'll get them cos 2 of them are non-examinable. n if i get them successfully, tues will be free day! luckily i only have to bid for 3 modules this time. :p
i like michael jackson's songs. *.^
Sunday, July 23, 2006
new record in 309 class gathering! attendance of 4 person, namely sun, mark, dear n me. how pathetic can it get? we've 24 ppl in our class but the most successful so far is still less than 50%.. aye.. sad case.. anyway dinner was great at changing appetite. thanks mark for treating us!
spent half a day at pan pacific. 1 word to describe: splendid! indeed it's worthy of the fame its accredited. i wish i can stay there too.. well.. it's just a wish..
Saturday, July 22, 2006
oh yes! i'm invisible. n so it seems. well.. i've decided not to bother myself with some stuff. they dont even appreciate or perhaps i'm just non-existent to them? watever. i've done my best anyway.
sometimes i wonder y m i sacrificing so much when the rest doesnt? my bro never has to take any responsibility.. this is unfair.. so what if he's a boy? there r things he have to take care of too. perhaps that's y i like guys who treasures familial ties. my second sis is another one. she's the more rebellious one in the family, just like my bro. sometimes it's bcos of the way she handles stuff that i question christianity.. ya.. i know every religion has its black sheep but well.. the others doesnt affect me. i guess it's wrong to blacklist it just bcos my sis doesnt behave the way a christian is expected to.. aye.. perhaps it's the church n her own personality la.. my sis place her frens above the family. which is wat puts my family off.. that makes my parents kind of against us going to church. well.. wat can i say? i believe in jesus too! but i'm not going to risk becoming like my sis.. though it means i have to give up more of my freedom..
ok. i'm done with my complaining. need to throw a tantrum once in a while.
Friday, July 21, 2006
wat a wonderful day i have today.. waited for 20 mins for my bus after tuition.. guess wat? it knocked the kerb while turning into a bus stop (it's only the 2nd one after i board!) with a loud bang. uncle got down quickly to check but he didnt bother to tell us to get off. he was talking animatedly on his hp.. anyway some ppl from the back of the bus started alighting cos there's a strong smell of petrol.. n so i followed suit after the odour intensified. i dont wanna be a burnt pig. gradually all the passengers vacated the bus but the uncle is still talking on his mobile? watever.. luckily the next bus came soon enough n i'm only too glad to get home quickly.
i just realise i need to take a total of 6 chem modules next yr. so for the 1st sem i'm already pre-allocated 2. now i just have to figure out which one will be the best to take in combination with what's on my plate.. cant believe my eyes when i see the lab duration.. 8hrs straight every week.. sigh.. i can camp in sch liao.. there goes my hope of taking jap lang..
Thursday, July 20, 2006
woke up with a terrible flu today.. guess i caught a cold last nite.. sigh.. doesnt feel like coming to work but well.. here i am.. hmmx.. tension in the office.. hope it's nothing serious.
alright! so it's set. 309 class gathering this sun. meet 4.45 at cityhall ok? we should be going changing appetite at marina square. sorry to those who cant make it. thanks to oli n mark for helping me! can u imagine calling 24 ppl all by urself?
i guess i'm really getting on ur nerves.. maybe i should comment less n u will not be so fed up with me? actually i dont really understand what's going on in ur mind.. or maybe i wont want to know..
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
i guess i'm getting lazier by the day.. had to drag myself to the office cos i felt so comfortable lazing around at home.. i guess i'm being spoilt. oops.. anyway my lady boss is back. yeah!! she bought me a t-shirt with ho chi minh printed on it n also a cute keychain. so nice of her. though i cant help but wonder. y is it everyone gets me t-shirt whenever they go overseas. my tutee also bought one printed gold coast on it for me when she went australia. mmx.. perhaps it's the simplest gift they can find at the souvenir shop? lol. but well.. it's the thought that counts. at least they still bothered. :P
there's a danger when u fall in love too hard..
thanks for the homemade chrysanthemum tea n for sending it straight to my doorstep. am i worth so much effort? i am not.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
alright. so i went out for lunch with 3 guys. stood out like a sore thumb cos throughout the whole journey they were talking about bikes n mac.. erm.. i'm not exactly it savvy n so i just sit there n stone. just as my boss said. i have to bear with it in silence.. was shocked when 1 of my colleagues asked if i've a bf. replied no n he stunned me with what he asked next. whether i'm straight. erm.. do i look like i'm not? n he keep saying i'm rich.. cos i stayed in the cbd area? kept pestering me to buy his brand new ipod nano. selling at 180 for 1gb. i know it's cheap but i dont really have use for it. i'm contented with my walkman phone. hee. will be out of the office in 15 mins time! yeah~
because of U i find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me..
because of U i dont know how to let anyone in..
it's another early day at the office. *yawn* i'm left with 3 guys cos my lady boss is enjoying herself in vietnam! so envious.. anyway i guess i'm so free lately that i've been blogging everyday. lol. looking back at my past past entries, i realized i've grown up! haha. i think i used to wallow in self-pity alot? mmx.. perhaps i've started seeing things from another perspective. or it could also be that there's more things happening in my life now for me to think negative thoughts. lol.
going to be a super busy day for me. 2 tuition scheduled cos both cant make it on other days. aye.. at least tmr i'll be free. hee.
going to organise another 309 gathering cos i wasnt able to make it for the last one. haha. ppl plz reply to me asap. either this fri (21st) or the next (28th). either the east (cos the girls r working there) or town. dont really wanna ask everyone cos it's such a hassle n anyway the turnout will be the usual group of ppl.
Monday, July 17, 2006
met up with dear today. had lunch at mushroom pot cos i have a craving for mushrooms. haha. n yes! my niece loves my dear! lol. keep smiling at her n she let her carry her without fidgeting much. i'm so jealous eh.. hee. dear bought a pair of earrings n a keychain for me from uk. so happy cos she remembered me even while she's overseas. haha. n i love them cos it's so pretty n cute! n like she said it's so me~ after that we went shopping! i havent done that for quite some time liao.. n so i bought some stuff. oops. spent quite a lot today. it's good to pamper myself once a while. lol.
Sunday, July 16, 2006
i cant take it anymore. y must u come back now n disturb me? i thought u said u can never be friends with the girl u break up with? at least u've proven that over the last 7 months by not keeping in any contact with me.. n now that i've finally gotten u out of the system u r coming back to harass me?! mind u, i'm really pissed. cant u get the msg when i send u cold replies? duhx.. dont say i never warn u. pester me somemore n i'm really going to lose my cool. i've decided not to have anything more to do with u the day u made me lose faith in u. so stop being a bugger. it's all over. there is no room even for friends.
have u ever been in love?
have u ever love someone so much it makes u cry?
have u ever need someone so bad u cant sleep at night?
i'm sorry if i hurt u so.. i dont think i can promise anything right now.. thanks for being so understanding.
Saturday, July 15, 2006
watched pirates of the caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest last night. excited cos it's my first time at cathay! been wanting to go there since it opened but havent got a chance. yup. i like the theatres there. wouldnt mind going there more often in future to watch show. lol. though i tink i'll need to bring jacket along the next time. have enough of becoming frozen pork.. i'd rather die from heat stroke.
i've just finished reading another book by danielle steel, second chance. i wonder how many of us actually get 2nd chances in life or do we have to resign ourselves to fate n live with regrets? life can play such cruel jokes on us.. we'll just have to move on.. that's what i see with the ppl around me. they move on when things doesnt work out or turn out the way they wanted it to. n once u miss it.. where r u going to get another chance? i got this idea from the book n i totally agree with it: there's no such thing as forever. when someone says i love u forever, he may mean it at the point when he said it (though there r some who doesnt at all) but who knows what may happen in the future? the only constant thing is change and life doesnt give you forever. sounds deep? yeah. it really sets me thinking. n i know i'm beginning to lose faith in love. more often than not, feelings r not eternal. as i've experienced it myself. he can say he likes u but after u fail to reciprocate his feelings immediately, he'll just turn to other girls. is that true love? what happened to all the sweet words n touching acts i see on tv? that's what drama do to u. it makes u unrealistic n desire for something that one will never find in real life. sigh. i'm still living in my own fantasy world..
it's nice knowing someone bothers to write a song for me.. thanks!
sometimes being silly n blur is a blessing in itself..
Friday, July 14, 2006
this is great. just great! barely 30 minutes i step into the office n my colleagues r going out for lunch.. this means i'm left alone in this tiny little office. can u feel the sarcasm in me? haha. i think i've been infected by an irritable monster lately. perhaps he should stop bothering me n i'll do just fine. anyway it isnt such a bad thing to be alone in the office. at least i can talk as loud as i want n not be conscious of ppl listening in on my conversation when i call ppl up. n there's nice romantic lovesongs for company too~ lol. i like my workplace. everything is so flexi n the ppl r generally nice to me. :p
sometimes i feel i do not have the capacity n am in no capacity to like anyone anymore.. it seemed impossible that i can care again.. n it seemed i had forgotten how to give.. love takes time.. to heal when u r hurting so much..
thanks for the note n chrysanthemum tea. greatly appreciated.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
i've just finished reading 1 book, Johnny Angel by Danielle Steel. yeah. i know it is kind of secondary sch level but well, i need to start somewhere basic. i used to read alot when i was in pri sch n perhaps lower sec. somehow i've lost that passion. anyway i shall read up more cos i think my language is getting stagnant. i guess i was rather stupid. i actually weeped. haha. talk about emotional.
got a call from someone i nv want to hear from again. it's always like this. heaven likes to make sport of man. whatever. not like i'm going to let myself be fooled. called to ask how i am? yeah right! do u even care n not i like care now. yup. i know i sound petty n all but well.. pls dont incur my wrath if u want me to treat u nice. Commented my hair style is nicer now, not as ah lian as before. absurd! n it doesnt concern u anyway. ok. enough of my rants. if not i'm going to turn real cynical. on a lighter note, for those of u who think i still have not gotten over him, u r so wrong! i have picked myself up already. thanks for all your concern anyway.
it seems like no one's picking up my calls today? weird..
if the past is holding u back, bury it.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
i tink i'm asking for it. questioning a ps major.. argh.. anyway just wanted to confirm my suspicion based on my almost infallible observation cum intuitive powers. but well.. cant help it if he wanna deny. anyway, we'll see. i'm usually 99% accurate. though this only applies when i'm an outsider. as the saying goes, dan(1) ju(2) zhe(3) mi(2). anyway not like there's many chance of being in the situation. hoho.
anyway i think most of the guys i know r prone to hallucination. 1 good example will be lw. called mi the other night cos he's too bored in the army. asked if i've a bf liaox.. i said no n he asked if i still like him? duhx.. look who's talking. crap. said he'll be mine if he break up. no thanks! if i really like him dont have to wait till now? it's been 4 yrs liao?
Monday, July 10, 2006
went to pat's commencement with wei. once again, we can only be envious of those ppl in their graduating robe. when will it be our turn? mm.. anyway saw quite some familiar faces there. ridwan n daniel r graduating too. wow.. time really flies.. n we also saw pris n siangwei there. so much like a mini acario gathering. haha. n xiang, such a pity u were not there.. cos hock was there! hoho. yeah. i know that's history already but i still like to say. revenge is sweet eh? then there's clement n dylan too. guess i know more ppl in arts? lol.
my very 1st n sadly last full n complete match that i actually watch this world cup.. (the rest r all bits here n there) disappointment though i muz say it was a pretty good fight by the french. france rocks! the referee is blind! n i feel so sorry for zidane.. hmph..
anyway it's funny i'm actuali bonding more with tekka ppl rather than my own og. last nite was Aviva's very 1st outing. steamboat at marina?! i've my reservations about that place.. n while waiting for xiang at the control station, this black Nigerian guy came up to me n asked for my name n number. lol. funny eh.. said he's a soccer player from 1 of the clubs in S League. oops. not that i'll know of. haha. anyway he's not good-looking enough so no intention of knowing him better. lol. hmmx.. i guess when girls r alone they have a higher chance of getting picked up? haha. anyway thought we have plans of watching soccer after dinner but sadly no.. so i joined the tekka ppl. wasnt such a bad idea afterall. guess i'm beginning to blend in there? haha. went to 1 of the councillors' house in a van packed with 12 ppl. can u imagine how crammed it is? it is really quite a sight. lol. n i finally got to play mj too. though no money is involved. thnkfully if not i'd lose big time. haha. i just dont have the gambling luck.
Saturday, July 08, 2006
i'm feeling quite sad now.. sigh.. did i do the right thing? i guess i've mishandled certain issues.. it is getting beyond my control n i've absolutely no idea y it is turning out to be the way it is now.. y cant things be simpler? perhaps life will never be n has never been..
am i foolish to think that fairy tales still exist? perhaps sweet n lasting love only happens in tv dramas never in real life.. or is it just me?
Friday, July 07, 2006
brewerkz totally rocks! i love the food there! n the beer's fantastic too! so glad we finali get to meet up. time for our regular updates n crapping around. hoho. 1 of the waiters came up to mi n asked if i'm local. he tot i'm a jap. haha. asked mi where i study n all.. mmx.. he's from indonesia, now on internship. lol. funny but friendly guy.
new tuition kid tmr! hope she's nice. n hope i still rem my stuff. haha
took a cab to work today cos i'm running late.. aye.. something's wrong wid mi lately.. aye.. woke up wid a terriblly sharp pain in my stomach. actuali is it even my stomach? it's btwn the chest n stomach area. ho. call mi a science student. lol. anyway i'm not sure y.. perhaps it's bcos i ate too much acidic stuff on an empty stomach last nite. some pomesteen(pomegranate + mangosteen) juice n pineapple. aye.. mummy will say serve mi rite. haiz.. i'm still feeling pain now.. ouch..
my boss is funny. offered mi a packet of potato chips. was niao-ed by my colleague who said i'm coughing lyk nobody's business n yet there he is.. asking me to eat dat. lol. i lyk my office! fun ppl they r.
oh yes! finali we r going to brewerkz! yuppy yup yup! i lyk to drink beer. hoho.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
You Find Love in Fairy Tale
Glass slippers, traveling minstrels, knights in shining armor. These are some of the classic components of fairy tales. And when it comes to your real-life love life, you'll take 'em in the form of candy and flowers, poems describing your beauty, tiny velvet boxes, and the like. Whether you are single or settled, you're a firm believer that the fairy tale shouldn't end when someone is carried over the threshold (though that's a pretty fun part, too).
You sometimes have to work to get your head out of the clouds, but your optimistic spirit and love-conquers-all attitude helps you deal with the good and bad that life might throw your way. As long as you can spot a poison apple when it knocks on your door, you'll always be able to find your happy ending.
i tink i'm so going to be sacked one day.. overslept n din go for work.. oops. excuse was my throat was pretty bad.. which was true to a certain extent. anyway shall make up for it tml. haha. n i din turn up for tuition yest either. went on a merry-go-round on the buses. haha. i tink i m becoming more n more lyk a sotong.. darn.. maybe it's due to the lack of sleep?
met up wid nanz n clara last nite. how i miss their company. it's been centuries since we last met up. thanks to busy nanz. lol. anyway, nanz n my conclusion for the nite: we shall not get into a relationship so quickly the next time. regrets. sigh.. the past's not worth mentioning..
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
i barely slept for 2 hours.. it's been ages since i stayed up so late outside.. guess i'm getting old.. cant take too many late nites. haha. anyway spent quite a fruitful dae wid the ppl of tekka. funny bunch of ppl though most of the time i'm stoning.. haha. partyworld,dinner,scary movie (which wasnt scary at all), mac.. hmmx.. talked about alot of stuff n crap. made mi realise there r guys dat r faithful to their partner too though appearances may not appear so. but well.. it's 1 in a million ba..
i'm so chao ta now.. is it the light? how come i din realise when i'm home? mmm.. no voice yet here i m.. calling ppl up.. sigh..
i was stupid for a while.. swept away by u.. n now i feel lyk a fool..
Monday, July 03, 2006
oops. my blog feels abandoned.. so i'm back to update.. been a few daes since i came back from camp. dun reali noe wat to blog. anywae too many things but too little time. anywae.. those who should know should haf known. those who wanna know then come n ask mi lo. lol. somehow or other, this yr's camp doesnt create dat much impact on mi than last yr.. perhaps i'm getting old or it's juz the diff level of responsibility..
went out wid wei n xiang yest. along wid my niece. oh yeah. i tink i look lyk an unwed mother.. sigh.. there goes my chance of knowing more guys.. haha. juz joking. *.*
