Complexity meets simplicity..
sometimes i feel dat my life is reali a disaster waiting to happen.. it is the worst thing dat can ever happen.. nuthin interesting ever occurs.. n it seems lyk there's nuthin meaningful in my life.. everyone around mi is leading fulfilling n enriching life.. wat about mi? i'm juz a nobody without a social life.. all my life has gone by wid nuthin i can boast of.. perhaps i should try to do something to bring sparks to my life.. but wat can i do? i'm juz a boring person without the courage to pursue my interests n to be confident of myself.. sigh.. maybe i'm suffering from low self-esteem ba.. but dat's juz the way i've been.. attributed to my upbringing.. seems lyk i'm wallowing in selfpity.. guess i hafta do something to make my life rite.. but sometimes circumstances does not seem to permit so.. i'm juz gonna end up a failure in life..
has anyone ever wondered wat it's lyk to die? i've alwaes been tinking how does it feel lyk to die.. will i feel pain? fear? my sis told mi i'll be tinking of my past life.. if it's meaningful, i'll die peacefully wid a smile.. if it's regretful, i'll die sadly n in remorse.. i wonder how i'll feel then? n wat will happen to mi after i leave the world? will i haf any more feelings? will i go to heaven? as a christian i'm supposed to believe there's heaven n dat's where i'll be when i'm gone.. but i m doubtful of dat too.. maybe i'm not a convicted christian ba.. cos i'm afraid of growing old.. afraid of dying.. n it doesnt seem to help dat i'm growing older by the dae.. sigh..
